Man, this weather has me feeling like I just got my bell rung. We’ve all been there. You’re the very definition of the word sluggish—daydreaming about what it must be like to watch a switchblade fight while trying keep at least 30% of the peanuts your ineffectively shelling and eating from making it down your shirt and out your pant leg when you stand up. All I can say is that I’m so grateful to have Personal and the Pizza’s masterpiece of brain dead beer fart rock, Brain Damage to keep me going. Happy Wednesday!
In Florida, they’re spreading truthiness about the President with the ferocity of a paintball gun on meth. There are so many convincing arguments against Obama—sorry, Robama—here that it’s hard to say which one will lead us closest to a Sharia law hellscape that swallows the elderly whole and digests them over a period of 40 slow, agonizing hours. So, grandma and grandpa, just pick one and go with it. And by “go with it,” I mean frantic chain mail forwarding.
I have no commentary to add to this video other than GUUUUHHHHAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!
It’s a rainy Friday here on the east coast, and I’ve never heard of BadBoysBlue until five minutes ago, when I entered “Rainy Friday” in the YouTube search bar and went “click.” All I know is they are surprisingly good at chasing the grey away.
Editor’s Note: Despite the curiously saucy preview image, nothing porny about the video.
Remember this classic commercial? Funny, right? Wrong. Did you notice all that talk about the swamps drying up? This was a subtle warning about climate change, plain and simple.
Every Wednesday, and sometimes on Thursday, we pull the most viewed YouTube video of the week and apply insignificant metrics in an attempt to gain a cursory, wildly-generalized understanding of the world around us. This week: I love the sound of clattering plastic in the morning. Smells like…kombucha.
Well, the NFL referee lockout has officially ended and not a moment too soon. The signal went out immediately last night to awaken Ed Hochuli from his sleep chamber ten miles beneath the Earth’s crust, bringing with him an unstoppable tide of high octane competence. Welcome back big Ed!
That seems like fun. Fun is awesome. Sometimes on my lunch break I go to the bank.
As seen on TV.
“You think this is a f**king game?!” -Mario